How to differentiate your emotions from those of others?
INFJs, empaths, Highly sensitive people, introverts, neuro-divergent individuals… all share common characteristics among which we count the ability to easily identify with the feelings of others.
When entering a meeting, they can naturally read the energy in the room, sensing if someone is angry about the outcome of the conversation, if someone else is eager to debate while another person might be nervous to share their opinion.
While all human beings have the ability to be empathic (except sociopaths?!) and understand how someone feels picking up on external cues such as verbal or nonverbal communication, individuals with an Emotional Overexcitability do not need to rely on these cues.
Due to the heightened intensity of the way they feel and process emotions, they often start connecting with someone else’s energy field without even noticing. This may have them starting to feel all sorts of emotions sometimes without being able to identify the trigger.
Eg. They may walk past someone who’s just lost a dear friend and feel their pain without having to communicate with or look at them. Violent movies may be difficult to watch, crowded places may be draining…
Being compassionate, empathetic and sensitive to the needs of others, they may however find it hard to make a distinction between their own and others feelings which they tend to prioritise above their own.
Concern about their behaviour in relationships and the possibility of hurting someone else’s feelings or generating low frequency energies (guilt, shame, anger…) which they intensely feel, they’re very self critical and experience feelings of inadequacy and inferiority.
Unfortunately, pleasing people is one of the best ways to disconnect from ourselves and bury our authentic self underneath a thick protective personality.
As I work with my clients on reestablishing the connection with their authentic self and turning up the volume of their inner voice, they often start doubting themselves while expressing their needs and desires :
“Is it really what I feel/think/want/need?”
Let the body speaks
Before getting trapped in analysis paralysis, allow YOUR body to show you the way.
All this time spent “feeling into” experiences of others may have had you dissociating from your own and trust me your body has a lot to tell you about who you are, who you have been and who you want to become.
Start bringing awareness to your body through breathing exercises, slow yoga practices where you can work on coordinating your breath to your movement, meditation, mindfulness…
The more time you spend being present, inhabiting your body fully, the easiest it will be to tune in to your intuition and process intense emotions leaving you with a greater capacity to protect your energy and keep your energetic field clear.
Define your authentic blueprint
Get a feel of your authentic self (you can do that with the free downloadable meditation below). Your authentic self is your essence, that pure version of yourself that you came to earth with. This essence has not been conditioned, it is not wounded, it does not need to protect itself. It expresses itself in its full power and in its deep authenticity.
Knowing how it feels like to embody your authentic self will help you determine what doesn’t feel aligned with your true self.
You may also work on identifying your personal value system to highlight what is truly important and meaningful to you so you can use it as a reference when having to make a decision.
Set clear boundaries
Setting boundaries might sound challenging at first - what shall my boundaries be? Am I being selfish? How do I know if I’ve reached my limits? How to communicate these boundaries without hurting others or having the impression that I’m being lazy?
Decide when you want to connect to others’ energies and when you don’t ! The more anchored/grounded you are, the easier it will be to protect your energy.
Learn to practice the Art of saying NO and start making decisions without asking for approval to build up self confidence. You may start small with just buying an outfit that you like without asking your friend or partner if that suits you, block some ME time in your schedule to prioritise your needs (sleeping, eating…) and allow some alone time to relax and reset…
Your boundaries can be emotional, energetic, physical, verbal… As someone who feels deeply, you will also feel when a boundary is being broken: Does it feel like you’re playing small? Do you feel any shame or guilt regarding the situation? Are you trying to justify someone’s bad behaviour? Do you feel overwhelmed?
Cleanse your energy field regularly
Although you may incorporate all of the above, being a sensitive soul, you will still absorb some of others’ emotions at times or repress your own when their intensity feels overwhelming.
That is OK! What’s important is to make sure to regularly regulate these excesses of energy and release energetic blocks so they don’t start manifesting negatively in all areas of your life.
To cleanse your energy you may have an energy healing session, you may smudge your space and aura, set up a journaling practice ritual to keep your emotions in check, do an energy clearing visualisation/meditation…
Want to see for yourself?
Download our free meditation to experience how it feels to fully embody your authentic self, knowing exactly what is true for you, what you want, while healing core limiting beliefs from your childhood.
Do you want to deepen the understanding of your sensitive way of functioning ? Learn how to redirect the energy of your overactive mind and sensitivity towards success in our webinar.