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  • margotpauvers

Do you feel that you can afford your success?

I’ve had clients contacting me and expressing their desperate need to change but saying they can’t afford my services, a career change or actually anything that would support potential changes right now.

Honestly, I can’t blame them. I’ve been there and most of the time it doesn’t come from a lack of « will » as we may hear in the coaching space. You know the typical : « If you really want it, just give yourself a good kick in the arse and you’ll find the required ressources. »

No, I don’t support that kind of advice which in my opinion only allow for more disempowerment.

If you’re already feeling a bit out of place or like you’re running against the tide, you probably already feel that a lot of your energy is already being invested towards your goals despite not reaping the rewards of your emotional, physical and energetic investments just yet.

By telling yourself that you should just try harder is the best way to exhaust your resources.

It’s not easy to « just quit your job and start your own thing », to « just break up and meet another partner », to « just invest in some support, in a new house or whatever when you feel like you’re already tight ».

It’s not easy to « simply step up » and it often feels impossible when you’re already in a low energy frequency.

The thing is when you’re in that state, you don’t see possibilities or you may see too many and therefore struggle to decide on which one to act upon.

Before you start doing even more than you’re already doing or before you take the leap to up level your current situation, make sure that you can afford your success.

What do I mean by affording your success?

I mean, make sure that your body, mind and soul are ready to welcome what you’re calling in. Even if everything feels right just now and you’re ready for more, making sure you can afford your success is how you will create powerful and most importantly sustainable results.

1 - Slow down and give yourself a break.

I know, that may sound counter productive but it’s not. Here me out !

While going through transition periods, our sense of safety and security is challenged. Change always implies to some extend a journey into the unknown - moving from what’s familiar (even if familiar means unsatisfying) towards somethings less familiar.

To embrace the disorientation and uncertainty that changes trigger, we need to build steadiness within ourselves.

Each of our chakras has a number of attributes like a specific color, an element but also maintaining specific physical and emotional functions within ourselves.

As we move into unfamiliar situations, it’s our root chakra which is primarily shaken.

Associated with security/safety, mental stability, survival and prosperity, the root chakra confers confidence and trust in ourselves and in the world around us.

It is particularly affected by our earliest experiences - for example, it may have been stressed by different childhood traumas triggering behaviors led by fear and lack.

In transition periods we tend to challenge our sense of self, our trust in ourselves and others, our trust in the future which is why it is important to balance the root chakra, work on our sense of safety and remain grounded. You want to be in your power to step up !

Additionally, the root chakra acts as a foundation on which we can build upon. When it is out of balance, the whole structure you’re building may fall apart.

Hence before stepping into action, slow down.

Sit quietly with yourself and try envisioning what « ideal » would look like.

You can download my free meditation to support you with that and navigate through early childhood beliefs that may get in the way of your success.

Slowing down and giving yourself a break also imply managing stress levels.

2 - Managing your stress levels.

We would often (always?) love to know the exact outcome of our decisions. If we do this or that, we’d like to know for sure that it will work out the way we hope.

Even if we may sometimes have strong intuitions, we can never know for sure how things will unfold and that may call for anxiety especially as we go through important changes.

Highly sensitive individuals have also a sensitive nervous system which therefore responds longer and more deeply to external stimuli. Welcome to my world !

As we’ve seen above, that means our sense of safety/security tend to be more easily challenged on all levels and all levels means that our nervous system will be challenged too even though we tend to overlook that impact.

Your nervous system is basically what’s going to judge on body level what identifies as a threat and decide on releasing adrenaline and cortisol hormone getting us ready to fight or flight.

The root chakra is the source of our survival instinct, also known as the fight or flight response.

The thing is, our nervous system is a little bit old fashioned when it comes to the modern world we live in. I mean, we don’t spend as much time as we used to chilling out in our old caverns before feeling a huge rush of adrenaline and stress hormones so we can step up against a mammouth. Right?

Our nervous system used to be punctually triggered by real life threatening attacks which would generate an important response from our body so we could fight or flight.

Nowadays our nervous system is constantly triggered by external stimuli (phone notifications, lights, noises, work and so on) so we tend to constantly produce small amount of adrenaline and stress hormones leading to chronic diseases on the long run.

In transition periods which tend to be particularly stressful, you’ll want to increase the resilience of your nervous system so you don’t feel overwhelmed by anxious feelings or reactions. That will mean learning to regulate your nervous system with practices of your choice such as meditation, yoga, journaling…

You may also deepen your f

eeling of trust in yourself and in the universe around you by tuning in high frequency energies (practice gratitude, feed yourself with positives…) and ultimately study the worst case scenario.

What could you do if it doesn’t work out? What could you do to lessen this possibility of outcome by even just 1%?

3 - Assess the situation.

Now, that’s taking us to actually assessing the situation. We often get stuck in « desire » - we want something but feel that we cannot have it/do it because X, Y, Z.

Feeling that you cannot afford

to do something or have something is mainly related to unbalanced root, sacral and/or solar plexus chakras but enough energetics for now.

Let’s take a look at the arguments you rely on to say that you cannot have or do X?

Your brain will seek for proofs and validation to confirm that these arguments are true so it can build a decision making system. If you aren’t feeling safe and capable deep down, that’s what your decision making system will be build upon.

So what happens if you provide proofs of the opposite to your brain?

Eg. I can’t invest in X because Y.

Challenge: Do you actually know the exact amount of the investment?

Have you talked to your bank to see what is actually possible for you?

What are you basing that on?

Find proofs: Find someone in a similar situation who did take the leap and talk to them or read their story. Show your brain proofs that it IS possible.

4 - What if it works out?

We instinctively focus on the negatives out of self protection but what if your investment actually pays out?

How would that feel?

What fear(s) is that uncovering? When did you overcome that fear in the past?

Feed yourself with images of a peaceful, steady and authentic success.

On the other hand, you might actually feel that it’s all going to work out. Yay!

Do you have a support system in place to handle the change? Are you ready to welcome all of this success? Now, back to Step 1 and 2 so you can make sure that it is sustainable on body, mind and soul levels.

Still not sure what’s holding you back from embracing an authentic success? Do you want to check whether you can afford that success on body, mind and soul levels?

Get in touch and share your concerns or objectives with me, I’d love to hear from you !

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